Just Let it Go – Moving to Detachment

by Baba Shuddhaanandaa Brahmachari

detachment_OMTimesRecently I was asked this question:

How does one best practice both detachment and active compassion? Like with one’s friends and children? How do you know when to give guidance or advice and when to let them go, to make their own mistakes?

All human souls in this world are bound by the fetters of attachment. Your strongest emotional bonds are with the ones who have come closest to your heart in your relationships and those with whom you have lived for a longer time. Physical distance at times only enhances the pang of separation.

For example, parents are naturally attached to their children and most of the time they are either prayerful or worried about their children and their future. No mother or father can rise above this whether they live close to the child or at a distance. Parents always have the most unconditional love for their children. But it is sometimes hard to differentiate between unhealthy attachment and unconditional love.

Do you know what attachment is? Do you know what love is?

Attachment is unconsciousness. The ego acts like an octopus, clinging to anything it believes is needed for its survival and pleasure. Attachment is the manifestation of the ego, your false self, as it tries to confine life to its own concepts and desires. When you love someone with conditions and expectations, your love is limited, rooted in attachment, which is the root of all miseries. Love is not meant to bring miseries; it is meant to expand our life to infinite joy.

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