Navigating the Challenges of Raising Children in a Chaotic World

Interview with Annie Burnside

By Karen M. Rider

There’s a missing peace in the world today and Annie Burnside believes it can be found in relationships that are closest to home: with ourselves, our partners and with our children. In her award-winning book, Soul to Soul Parenting: A Guide to Raising a Spiritually Conscious Family, Burnside shares the wisdom and tools that she has used, for more than twenty years, to inspire raised consciousness in individuals and families around the world. Her approach is ground-breaking in that it invites spiritual development for both parent and child. Burnside reminds us that we are above all else creative, intuitive, eternal, infinite, energy beings who can consciously create our own reality if we choose to do so. Her tools bridge the modern with the metaphysical and inspire us to listen to the voice of soul so that direct divine connection can become fully accessible within the daily reality of raising children, managing commitments and thriving through change in the world. Soul to Soul Parenting teaches the difference between soul-to-soul and role-to-role and shows how to apply principles such as oneness, self-love and authenticity within the busyness of daily life. She cultivates an open, gentle approach with her clients, and her readers, that encompass all spiritual paths. A spiritual journey book for all ages, Soul to Soul Parenting shows us how one mother weaves her personal path of self-discovery into a positive and transformational parenting approach and created a framework for other parents who desire the same.

In this interview, Burnside shares soulful approaches that any family can integrate into their daily lives to reconnect with spirit.

Karen:  You were a stay-at-home mom with holistic interests. How did that lead to a career as soul nurturer, conscious parenting advocate and spiritual development coach for individuals and families?

Annie:  I have always had a passion for consciousness-raising in relationships. I’m a long time student of metaphysics, too. When I chose to leave my career in education, I began applying what I was learning for myself to my relationship with my spouse and our three children. Friends and colleagues saw what I was doing and invited me to give lectures and workshops on spirituality. From there, the work has simply grown in a very grassroots way. One day on a walk, the title Soul to Soul Parenting came to me quite clearly, and I felt that I would write a book so that the message could move beyond my local area. The manuscript poured out of me! We continue to evolve as a family just like everyone else. We are a modern family, which is really the point of the book. We do not need to move to a secluded mountaintop to experience conscious spirit-embodiment. In the twenty-first century, we are being called to widen our perceptive right here and right now in the midst of being fully human.

Karen:  We see the terms Holistic, Enlightened, Conscious and now Soulful Parenting used interchangeably. Do you discern between these three? For example, I see Holistic Parents as those who follow natural approaches to childbirth, childrearing and naturopathic medical care. Holistic parenting doesn’t necessarily mean enlightened.

Annie:  For me, Enlightened/Conscious/Soulful Parenting hold the same meaning. Holistic Parenting shares similar threads, but may not be as spiritually focused as the others. I view Holistic Parenting in the same way that you describe.

Soul to Soul Parenting seeks to move beyond the physical realm to understand the child from an energetic perspective, too. The human body is seen as only one aspect of the child’s totality as an eternal, infinite spiritual being on one leg of his/her journey. From this widened vantage point, everything is different—there is a core belief that there is so much more to the child, and all of life, than what meets the eye. The parent becomes willing to allow that larger perspective in regards to life choices, priorities, thoughts, words and deeds. In Soul to Soul relationships, one feels for the underlying texture of all that occurs rather than simply the rational, socially acceptable aspect of life. We all simply desire to be fully seen, heard and acknowledged. The Soul to Soul Perspective invites parents and children to shift their focus on the external world almost exclusively to a deeper intimacy with their own soul. Greater intimacy with our own soul creates a conscious perception of who we really are as spirit-embodied. Ultimately, this shift in core belief will internally ignite true self-esteem and simultaneously change our world.

Karen:  What are the qualities of Soul to Soul (enlightened/conscious) Parenting?

Annie:  There is a growing belief in the world today that enlightenment is very possible for all who deeply desire it. Publicly discussing spiritual development and matters of the soul continues to accelerate at tremendous speed due in part to individuals like Oprah, who have brought the body/mind/spirit language into the mainstream.

I think conscious parenting is on the rise because more and more parents themselves are becoming self-aware and honoring their authenticity. Due to the joy, freedom and empowerment derived from such interior knowing, they desire, above all else, for their children to experience self-realization and comfort within their own skin. Many parents are seeing that the family unit offers a magnificent opportunity for personal growth in both the parent and the child, simultaneously. We are mirrors for one another, and parents are beginning to utilize family relationships as the gift that they truly are as we move into wholeness.

Soulful parents desire a safe place for children to work through challenges and release negative emotions as they occur rather than stuff down, deny or save for later creating a tremendous amount of unnecessary baggage and psychic debris. Instead there is a growing shift to live true as soon as possible so that children can get on with what they came here to offer the world in their own special way. Essentially, as parents become more conscious, they cannot help but desire that for their children. The grandest hope for their children is not that they fill their lives with endless accomplishments that require a total focus on doing, but rather that they come to know themselves experientially as a unique part of the divine whole through an increasing number of moments of pure being—illumination.

Karen:  What are some peaceful practices that parents can teach at home?

Annie:  We hold a weekly family discussion, utilize role-play, and use visual cues around our home as three daily means to integrate a spiritual practice into our lives. Once life-affirming themes such as self-love, authenticity, and oneness have been introduced then they can be woven into all aspects of life—friendships, disappointments and choices—to offer an expanded perspective in everyday reality.

Karen:  What can parents do when their young children bring forth tough questions about war, death and violence? 

Annie:  Only the parent can decide how best to answer the difficult questions with their own children. Greater intimacy with your own soul will light the way. My best advice is to go down the path of personal growth yourself and then have the courage to begin speaking the language in your home, and most importantly, fully integrating your growth into a living, breathing model as yourself consciously spirit-embodied. This does not happen overnight as it is ongoing work with no finish line; as the parent becomes more whole, the child feels it and it gives them permission to be fully themselves, joyfully self-express, and share their true feelings. I know of no other way.

My work and book are about steering the parent towards their own inner compass rather than relying on “experts” to provide the answers…We have introduced such topics as Physical Death/No Energetic Death, Oneness/Individuation, Self-Love, Connectedness/Boundaries, Sacred Body, Soul to Soul vs. Role to Role over and over again beginning with small, short explanations and leading to deeper and wider in scope as they have gotten older.

Karen:  How is your book different from others on the market?

Annie:  Soul to Soul Parenting was written as an enhancement for all belief systems and as a guidebook for personal spiritual development for both parent and child. The premise is that greater intimacy with our own truth, our own soul will provide all that we need. As discussed in the book, there are millions of paths up the mountain that can lead to self-realization. It is only when we begin to make others wrong for their path of truth and connection that our own path becomes less pure.

 Karen:  That’s an illumination the world can really use! What final words of wisdom would you like to share?

Annie:  It is never too late to begin a process of personal growth! Soul to Soul Parenting is entirely based on what we have put in place in our own life to offer personal development and expanded spiritual awareness to our children so that they can, right now, utilize their capacity to lead a conscious and fulfilling life. We do not want them to have to wait for a tragedy or a disappointment to awaken them. Inner work must become a top-priority. Our children are slowly coming to understand that they are responsible for their own reality. They must on the front-end be accountable for thoughts, words, deeds, priorities, choices, beliefs, health, etc. by perceiving themselves as captains of their own ship. Along with that, they can be taught ways to navigate challenges as they occur. This work is ongoing and simultaneous for both the parent and the child—a continual balance of inner and outer pursuits… Provide the space and opportunity for your children to focus on their interior world as much as the exterior world, allowing greater intimacy with the voice of their own soul to feel what resonates as truth for them.

5 Tips for Connecting with a Child Emotionally, Energetically and Spiritually on a Daily Basis

1. Utilize everyday life—such as friendships, nature, mealtimes, music, movies, and much more—as the perfect curriculum and forum to teach your children powerful, universal principles such as connectedness, self-love, presence, and forgiveness.

2. Model authenticity through speaking and living your truth—this gives your children permission to do the same.

3. Show your spirit daily so that your children can witness multiple aspects of you, and in turn, see multiple aspects in themselves.

4. Teach your children that they are intuitive, creative, eternal spiritual beings—much larger than simply their physical form—and filled with infinite possibility and the capacity for direct divine connection.

5. Train your children to be more conscious of thoughts, words, and deeds so that they can assume greater responsibility for the shaping of their own reality.

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To learn more about Soul 2 Soul Parenting and Annie Burnside, visit: http://www.annieburnside.com/ or http://soultosoulparenting.com