Stopping the Suffering Addiction and the Compulsion to Suffer
By virtue of the process of individual programming and conditioning along many generations, we have been taught to believe that if we don’t make something happen, it won’t happen. I think this is the same as watering a garden when it is already raining. An inner attitude of flowing with life demands great creative power. To make an alliance with the movement of the universe as it is manifested in what we call “our life” is to let powerful change occur, changes that are already there, waiting to be allowed to occur, in agreement with some other plan that may not be those conceived of by our conditioned mind.
The discussion of this subject is necessary because it enables us to detect and cancel out those areas of our life in which suffering prevails. In The Power of Now, Eckhart Tolle advises what we should do when trouble or nuisance affects our life. He says that when we are at peace with ourselves, flowing with life, we have always three non-suffering options; however, most often we choose a fourth, which is, precisely, suffering.
Option 1. To change what I don’t like, or to ask for what I want, ready to receive a “No” answer and to negotiate as needed. This means to use every possible means to change the situation. If I’m cold, I put on some clothes or look for shelter; if I’m hungry, I eat; if I’ve no food, I ask or search for it; if I’m ill, I try to heal myself, etc. If I have trouble in the relationship with somebody, I resort to conscious communication, speaking honestly, expressing how I feel and what my needs are. I make all the required demands knowing that the answer to everything I demand may be “No” but also “Yes”. I implement every needed change, convinced that if changes are possible, it means that the universe agrees with them, or, in other words, that the universe makes changes through me. Now, if even doing every possible thing I can’t change the situation, there are two more options available without losing peace of mind.
Option2. To accept wholly and thoroughly what is happening without blaming anybody or complaining about anything, at peace with myself. This doesn’t mean to give up or surrender, which would imply to generate emotional contractions full of sadness, resentment, fear or guilt. When we accept life and are allied with it, we find ways to enjoy it such as it is. Accepting or giving in after trying every possible change-or even while we are trying-gives us a lot of energy and makes us much more creative.
By virtue of the law of attraction, we thus attract into our life energies similar to ours. In the case of chronic or terminal illnesses, incurable physical disabilities, tragedies, accidents, or the death of a loved one, this attitude may provide a lot of inner peace and strength. Besides, it increases the ability of our body to heal itself, because it is not spending its vital force in imaginary pain. There are countless examples of people who were able to improve their quality of life in a surprising way just by finding their inner peace and making an alliance with life instead of resisting it. But if I can change nothing and it’s impossible for me to accept, there is still one more option to exercise without losing peace.
