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Love Comes First

Love Comes First

Love Comes First

By Kathy Custren

You have probably heard the old riddle, “Which came first, the chicken or the egg?”  It is the kind of question that can set your mind into a spiral.  As we think of what needs to be first (the object that reproduces life, or the being that produces the object), there is something that trumps them both.  Love.

We may even choose to categorize it by the spiritual or material, or seek to know it as either a verb or noun, this ‘being of love.’ Everything that manifests or is created comes into existence as a result of love. Love is the ultimate “yes.” These are not such bold statements when you think about them.  We see what happens when physical things are destroyed or killed.  They are removed from being, no longer afforded the opportunity or possibility of change or further expression.  This does not mean that all things that leave our existence do so because of hate or what we might call evil.  It could be a loving gesture by our Source to stop some unsuitable or misdirected way, similar to how we might prune a tree or bush to maintain some control or health over its life.

No doubt, you have heard it expressed that love is everywhere, that “God is Love,” or maybe your own thoughts have led you down the path of curiosity as to what might be the first-ever state of being.  Even before we look at the most basic forms of what comes naturally, all of Mother Nature’s bounty and beautiful things come from love; even imperfect things.  Before the first point is made, the first line is drawn, or the first two cells join, the existence of love is THERE.  It is felt before its intention to express make itself evident.  It exists regardless of being expressed in some way.  It is an emotion that needs no language; an entity that needs no name.

Knowing that love comes first may help explain a lot of what happens in our material world.  We often think of love in terms of two people falling in love, but even a single being can hold the intention of a good, loving relationship.  It may take two to tango, but a single person can still have a good time dancing.  It can be wonderful to share with others, but being able to investigate even an isolated curiosity will lead the seeker to that loving connection.

We really realize this is true, when we wonder why others do not want to share or serve, or even bother with learning all they can about love.  Surely, if a single person can realize love in their life, it then becomes a matter of wanting to share that realization.  In sharing, love is spread, moves forward, and encourages new growth and further being.



The realization of love and its evidence in our existence is felt so strongly, that we sometimes do not know what to do when we encounter an action that does not promote love, or person who does not operate as a loving being.  On an instinctual level, we realize something is wrong when we meet someone who chooses to act in horrible or hateful ways.  Has that person fallen so far away from the Source of all that is?  Might they be able to find their way back, if given the chance?  Nature has plenty of examples of change or how a process exists for transformation.  It can be a messy process, but the possibility is there that the old gives way to the new or that those things that no longer serve can be modified and given a fresh start.

As we realize how important “being love” truly is in our life, as both a verb and a noun, we may choose to place our energies with this most basic emotion.  We can look at our existence, at the time we spend doing, and judge for ourselves how much time we spend in that mode.  If love means giving or sharing in its expression, we can determine how effective or true to love we are.  If we spend one hour of the day in a loving mode and the rest of the time in a selfish mode, then we have some work to do!   We can choose to change to a more loving expression or devote more hours of the day to being love.

On the other hand, if we devote all or the majority of our being to love, we can see if that is healthy or presents a problem.  Can there be such a thing as “too much love” as an extreme?”  It is a good question to consider–must there be a limit or a control on how much we love, or how much of it we can withstand?  There are people who give of themselves on a constant basis, who we might call the quintessence of being love; but might they suffer in some way?  Is that possible?   How much of a balance does there need to be?  Is that determination a personal one, or one to be decided among a group?

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How might our own existence change if we give our energies to being love?  What measure or percentage is acceptable or workable–all or some?  Does being in this physical plane of existence automatically come with limitations of “how much love” we can be, or might we push past those boundaries?

If we trust ‘being love’ and go with the flow, we can do it without fearing the results.  I have a feeling what we find will be as different and unique as each of us are.  We may not know until we listen to our instinct, follow our heart, and really go in that direction, mindfully.

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