Inner World of Yoga – Day 26
The problem is not what occurred or why it occurred, but how it was PERCEIVED by the child.
As a result, the child goes through life and into adulthood and whenever she is faced with what she perceivesas negative aggression against her or someone trying to manipulate her, no matter what she says in response, she feels helpless, unloved, unheard, and powerless to respond. She quietly leaves, and eats to feel better. She doesn’t know why she can’t stand up for herself, overeats and feels guilt, and the pattern continues.
The underlying unmet needs and buried unacknowledged emotions fuel this pattern of behavior of walking or running away from the situation, and comforting herself with food. In the developmental view of Yoga, at the time her (little) ego – meaning her foundational strength of will, was developing, and it took a beating from a lack of acknowledgment, validation and comfort from probably the most central person in her life, her mother. As a result the foundational energy in her lower chakras became compromised.
If her mother had been able at the time to comfort her, listen to her pain, reassure her she was right to say no, and validate her, bringing her to where she again felt safe and her world back in balance; even if it was followed by a cookie, her adult pattern may not have included a food obsession.
This is just one hypothetical scenario. If the child had thrown the cookie on the floor, run out the door screaming, run after the other child or hit her back, etc., the samskara would still be there, and a pattern would still have resulted, but probably in a different behavioral form. For instance, if the child’s tendency was to be assertive rather than meek, she may grow into adulthood with the attitude that if you want something or don’t like something, make your desires known and act directly and decisively.
