Raise Your Kids to Resist Bullying
By Jennifer Shipp
Bullying is sort of like sex in a way. Parents would rather not think about it and believe it won’t ever happen to their kids. But the reality is, bullying is and always has been a problem. For the past ten to twenty years, researchers have been studying the impact of bullies on the children around them and so the rest of the world is starting to take notice of the problem. But despite getting attention from the scientific community, most parents expect that issues that arise on the playground will just take care of themselves. If you’re willing and ready to confront the issue of bullying head on, you can raise a child who is somewhat resistant to the mean, pushy kids. But start early. Kids need to be prepared for bullies before they encounter them.
The idea of raising kids to believe that everything in the world is rainbows and butterflies is lovely, but sadly unrealistic. Rather than trying to present a sugar-coated version of the world to young people, parents need to equip their children with tools that they can use to confront reality. Of course, reality is different for a four year old than it is for a fourteen year old and parents should adjust the tools to fit the developmental stage of their child. But kids need to be aware that there are bullies before you send them off to kindergarten. By teaching your child the word “bully” when they’re young, you’re giving them a word to use to communicate with you about what’s going on the playground when they encounter a bully for the first time.
It’s important that parents don’t bully their children if they don’t want their children to be bullied or bullies. If you spank or hit your child as a form of discipline, your child will think it’s okay for others to hit them too. If you verbally abuse your child, your child will either do the same to others or expect for other to treat them as you do. Set a good example of human behavior to your child and watch a few episodes of SuperNanny if you don’t already know the Time Out method before your child goes to school. You’ll be happy with the results as time goes by.
Enroll your child in a martial arts and self-defense school that talks about and addresses bullying. Children can’t always fight back on the playground the way that adults can fight back in street settings. As adults, we have the right to defend ourselves if we’re physically attacked. But a child who fights back may be accused of starting a scuffle. Things aren’t always fair on the playground. Your child needs to know some basic, harmless maneuvers that will help him or her get the upper hand physically. And talk with your child about verbal abuse. Help your child come up with ways to retort to inappropriate taunts.
Finally, don’t ignore your child if he or she seems distraught over bullying. Take the problem seriously and imagine if you were encountering the same situation in your work environment. It would be demoralizing. Remember, adults can quit their job and go to a new job if they really don’t get along with other coworkers, but children rely on their parents to cope with bullying. A child who is bullied for many years is going to be affected by it. As the parent, you’re responsible for making sure your child is in an environment where he or she can thrive.
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Take the first step toward immunizing your child against bullying by enrolling him or her in martial arts classes. Today, there are online classes available through American Kick Association (http://www.AmericanKickAssociation.com ) for children ages 7 and up. Martial arts can help your child develop self-confidence and self-control.
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