The Good, The Bad And The Opportunity…and this does not mean opportunities are ugly. On the contrary.

By Hilde Pols

Do you recall Morricone’s musical theme for the film? A decisive back and forth leads to a downwards phrase or an upwards phrase. Yet only when it balances out and moves forward does it find closure. Is this melodic progression teaching us something?

In everyday life we like to comment on circumstances being good or bad, yet do not as readily move forward with what they offer: opportunities. Declaring something good or bad, is a perfect way to circumvent obstacles presented to us. However, instead of commenting on the cards we are dealt, it is best to turn them into opportunities and make the most of them. Many card games have been won with a bad hand, because the player knew how to find opportunity in it. Meanwhile the good hand lost sight of opportunity as the praise of the cards dealt blinded the player.

The Yin and Yang of Life

We live in duality. Small and big offer means of comparison. Hot and cold allow us to differentiate. And good and bad form an ever present equilibrium. Without these words or notions of distinction, there would be no yin to the yang, no counterpart.

Yet many of these distinctions are culture based or even man made. For example the old Egyptians and Hebrews referred to the cardinal directions as front and back, as if they were standing facing east (Hebrew) or south (Egyptian). I.e. a third non-divisible factor comes into play: the relationship to the observer, similar to the resting point of a seesaw or the upright central pillar of a set of scales. Likewise, good or bad like to define themselves in relation to the commentator.

The yin/yang principle and symbol, as handed down from the Tao tradition, is well known. However, its understanding is incomplete until one finds and understands this third aspect, which Taoism calls Tai Chi. It is the emptiness from which the separate contrasts of yin and yang evolve, but also the creative force, enabling us to move forward.

Goldilocks’ Wisdom

Goldilocks might not be a welcome house guest, but she sure knows how to find what she needs. She could have given up when encountering a too hot or too cold. But she knows there is a just right to be found. As she encounters what is not right for her, she presses on, instead of going hungry, without rest or even sleep. She does not allow an experience to hold her back from continuing on her quest.

However, what would have happened if she had encountered the just right bowl of porridge, chair or bed on her first try? Being in balance from the start, she would be none the wiser. With no quest there is no understanding of what makes something just right. So the not rights become stepping stones on her quest.

Knowing Good from Bad

Do we really know good from bad? A tale in the Taoist Huainanzi script recounts the following:

A farmer’s only horse runs away. His neighbor comments, “That’s bad!”, to which the farmer replies “Is it?”

The next day the horse returns bringing several wild horses with it. The neighbor rejoices, “That’s good!” – “Is it?”

A day later the farmer’s son rides on a wild horse, falls and breaks his leg. The neighbor sadly murmurs “That’s bad!” – “Is it?”

The next sunrise brings the army to the community. It forces all able-bodied young men to serve in a faraway war. Yet the farmer’s son was spared due to his broken leg.

What seems good today might turn out to be bad tomorrow. What you call good is bad to another. Yes, proclaiming something good can earn you congratulations and good feelings. Pronouncing something bad can get you sympathy or a hug. But neither judgement will propel you forward. In a way it offers procrastination or even the safety of not having to act.

We find a comfortable place of stagnation, as we discuss the good and bad traits of people, circumstances and life. It even seems a social sport to sit down to a cup of tea and argue about such details. Though once that cup is empty, it wants to be refilled by knowledge, experience or the opportunity to gain either.

The Opportunity

Life offers us many chances to experience the many forms of yin and yang. Yet it is up to us to make use of the acquired knowledge, turn these into Goldilockian stepping stones and seek opportunities. Hence achieving or recognising good or bad should neither become goals in themselves, nor be ignored to seek the true goal. Instead accept people and occurrences as guides and teachers to help you move forward. In short, rather than judging someone or something as good or bad, find the innate opportunity they offer.

So the next time something good happens, celebrate it. But also take a moment to learn from it and take on the tools it offers for your further journey. The next time something bad happens to a friend, offer them a hug. Yet go further and encourage them to discover the positivity it offers in the form of new opportunities. Good and bad are two sides of the same coin, but the coin only comes together as a whole when it is recognized and used as such.

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About the Author

Hilde Pols combines her music training with her energy work: As a flute and ensemble teacher she developed many techniques to encourage creativity and a sense of the own body, mind and soul. As a Certified Meditation Instructor, Healer and Dorn/Breuss Therapist she supports individuals to take life into their own hands. Located in Germany she has also taught in Denmark and the US.