The Art of Letting Go
by Ann Christine Johnson
Attachment is form of fear, doubt and worry. Letting go is an art – a skill that takes courage, strength and time to master.
Human beings are inclined to be attached to all sorts of things. They’re inclined to be attached to their loved ones and family pets; their close relationships and professional status; their work role and standing in the community; their money and material possessions; the past and things remaining the same. They’re inclined to be attached to their own spiritual beliefs; their own core values and political beliefs; their own addictions and ‘bad’ habits. They’re inclined to be attached to needing other people’s approval.
Holding onto painful memories; holding onto things that we can’t or will not let go; trying to make the world conform to our wishes; requires enormous energy. Letting go is part of the growth process. We cannot move onto the new while continuing to hold onto the old. Letting go is simply making a choice to no longer allow anything from the past to negatively affect our life right now; to no longer allow fear, anxiety, grief, resentment or depression to rule our life; to no longer allow others expectations or opinions to us to define us. The benefit of letting go is that we can start our life anew, free of the restrictions that have previously hindered our progress.
Emotions are sensors that help us to understand, in the moment, the experiences that we are living. They are indicators of our alignment or misalignment with God. Feelings such as fear, despair, grief, guilt, insecurity, anger, depression, anxiety, despondency and doubt are examples of misalignment with God – Universal Love, Source Energy. By letting go of the need to focus on the negative aspects of life; by letting go of the need to focus on what we don’t want to be happening in our life; we can realign ourselves with God quite easily.
‘Should’ is a powerful word that is often misused. Notice what happens inside you when you use or hear this word. ‘Should’ implies a moral imperative – if I don’t do what I ‘should’ do I am a bad person; if you don’t do what you ‘should’ do you are a bad person. Set a goal to catch yourself every time you’re on the verge of using this word and to replace it with the word ‘could’ as soon as it leaves your mouth. ‘Try’ is another word that is often misused. Trying is not doing. Trying dilutes intention. It rarely produces the results you want. The mind-set of trying comes at a cost. Set a goal to remove the words ‘try’ and ‘trying’ from your vocabulary and to replace them with action-oriented statements such as “I will make a start on my school project today.” The shift in language will make a big difference to your success.
Learn to let go of your attachments. Learn to let go of the need to take care of other people and learn to care about them instead. Learn to let go of the need to rescue, ‘help’ or steer others in the “right” direction and allow others to manage their own lives in their own way and time-frame. Learnt to let go of the need to nag, reprimand and argue with others, or to judge, criticise or control them, and allow others to be human. Learnt to let go of the need to be in the middle of arranging all outcomes for other people and allow others to affect their own destiny; to let the go of the need to adjust everything that is happening in your physical environment to the way it suits you. Instead, learn to take each day as it comes and to cherish and value yourself in it.
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About the Author
Ann C. Johnson Assoc MAPS: General Psychologist has worked in the helping professions for the past 35 years. In the past 7 years she has published 3 books on personal and spiritual development. Inspired by posts she reads of Facebook and events happening in her own life Ann continues to write articles on a regular basis.
Ann can be found at: https//: www.facebook.com/annjohnson1948
