Shift Your Perspective: On Control
How many times have you wished that you had control–could make someone do one thing or another — love you, be cooperative, be more ambitious, or believe what you believe…the list goes on and on? Or wanted to have complete control at work or with your life in general? Or wanted to try making something happen more quickly? What was your reaction when it did not happen? Frustration? Anger? Agitation?
Control is the act of exercising authority, managing, or having power over something or someone. This can apply to both internally and externally focused targets. Many times, the focus is to exert control over external forces, people, or circumstances. Trying to dominate events goes against Universal Law. The act of allowing things to happen as they are meant to in the time they are supposed to creates a calmer approach to life where acceptance, rather than control, prevails.
Most things in life are out of our direct control. Trying to control external circumstances is by and large out of the scope of what is reasonable. There are too many variables to account for all of them. In attempting to control a circumstance, there is no way to manage every interaction required to create the exact scenario you wish to manifest.
The best, and most effective, option is to control the self — the thoughts, emotions, and reactions to external stimuli. You have control over the quality of work you produce, the way you treat others, the condition of your living space, and the way you feel on a daily basis. In each moment, you choose your reactions, feelings, and thoughts. You have the ability to gain control over negative automatic thoughts that create anxiety. You determine how you feel about and react to occurrences throughout the day.
Gaining control over the self includes exploring the underlying reasons for what you think and feel at any given moment. If you respond in a way that does not serve you, ask yourself what drives that sort of behavior. Is there a belief about yourself or about the situation that makes you react in one way or another?
The more confidence you have, the more control over the self is possible. If you believe in yourself, there is no need to convince others that you are right or to control their behavior. If you feel content there is no need for the approval of others. When you accept yourself, everyone and everything around you aligns with that.
If you are striving for inner peace and harmony in your life, the first thing to give up is the need for control. It creates an imbalance that interferes with the paths of others, with the natural order of things, and with your energy level. It’s exhausting to try to control everything around you. By doing so, you control nothing.
Having control over the self is an act of ultimate strength and power. There are many aspects of a situation that are unknown to any one person and to admit that there is much that is not known, a healthy outlook and minimal need for control results.
Accept things as they are and allow people and circumstances to run their natural course. Have faith in the way things are and seek to discover the lessons reflected back to you.
By giving up control, things turn out for the best in their own time. Flowing with the energetic tides allows more time for work on the self rather than trying to control that which is the domain of the Universe. – Diane Wing
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About the Author
Diane Wing, M.A. is the founder of Wing Academy of Unfoldment, host of Wing Academy Radio, author of five books, and an experienced guide for those ready to see things differently. When it comes to getting unstuck and feeling great about life, her 9-word philosophy is: Let go. Be grateful. Stay open. See the magick. Find out more at: www.DianeWing.com
