Embrace the Shake

by Allen Klein, MA, CSP

“Years ago,” says therapist, Dave Cooperberg, “I commuted across the San Francisco Bay Bridge. Driving home one evening I was feeling tired but relaxed after a good, hard day at work. Suddenly, a driver decided to move from the fourth lane to the first, without bothering to use his indicator or consider the cars between him and where he went. I quickly braked, and felt the adrenaline shoot into my system as I went quickly from fear to anger. I told myself, ‘This idiot could have killed me!’ when I became aware, perhaps because my car was getting harder to control as I drove faster, that the peaceful mood I had was gone. Then a thought occurred to me: ‘Why should I let this person’s actions ruin my evening?’ So I slowed down my driving and my breath. I made the conscious choice to let go of my outrage, no matter how righteous. I breathed out those feelings and returned to a state of peace, suddenly in awe of the power in making that choice.”

Sometimes it may seem that the entire world is conspiring against you. It probably isn’t but it still feels that way. So, what do you do? Hitting your head on the wall hurts. Hitting someone could get you locked up. Hitting the bottle could result in a major hangover. One thing you can do, that will work, is to embrace your situation instead of cursing it.

Phil Hansen is someone who has done that. In art school, he developed a tremor in his hand that prevented him from creating the pointillism drawings he loved. For three years he gave up art, until a neurologist suggested that instead of letting his condition stop him from producing works of art, he could “embrace the shake.”

With this new way of looking at his setback, what started out as something that limited him actually liberated him. When his funds were too small to purchase art supplies, he made art from coffee cups. When he couldn’t afford canvas, he used his body on which to paint. At other times, instead of using his hands to create his artwork, he used his mouth or his feet. What was originally limiting, became limitless.

If Hansen could “embrace the shake,” then you, too, can embrace your trying situation instead of focusing on the irritation and upset.

Sure, you may be going through a difficult phase in your life right now. Sure, you may feel despondent about what is happening. Sure, you may feel that everything is going wrong. But that doesn’t negate all the positive things in your life.

Part of the key to getting through the difficulty you might be having is to focus on what is right with your life instead of what is wrong. That way, you can make a lousy day into a lovely one.

Adapted from, You Can’t Ruin My Day; 52 Wake-Up Calls to Turn Any Situation Around (Viva Editions, 2015), by Allen Klein

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About the Author

Allen Klein, a/k/a “Mr. Jollytologist®,” is an award-winning professional speaker, who shows audiences worldwide how to find and use humor to deal with changes, challenges, and not-so-funny stuff.
Connect with Allen at: http://www.allenklein.com