The 3 Fears That Make Us Hide Our Greatness
In our childhood, we may not have any fears, any shame, or any worries. We may have been confident in ourselves and our abilities, and so our light shined bright. But as we grow, our self-confidence tends to be challenged and to diminish, and fears tend to arise that make us invisible.
What To Do When Our Fears Make Us Invisible
The desire to be invisible comes from all the social and cultural beliefs that we acquired and assimilated through life. Those fears will solidify as we grow older and undergo many experiences. As we know, our opinions and beliefs have a tendency to limit us. For example, if we think we’re going to make a mistake in a presentation and that actually happens, we probably will not want to talk in public at a later date. In fact, we can get quite convinced that we’re bad speakers when that’s not true.
Some of the beliefs we have only promote our fears. Fear of being alone, fear that nobody wants us, that no one pays attention. Fear of not having the perfect family, not taking the best grades at school, disappointing others or failing to reach goals. These fears that make us invisible lead us to recognize with specific labels that do not match us.
Our greatness scares us
We live in a society that continually throws us down, leading us to compare ourselves with others and to analyze in detail all our faults. Where are our strengths? In the shadow. They are ready for us to look at them, so they can come to light and thus be aware of our potential. Shadow work is essential to our personal development.
Where do all these fears that make us invisible begin to take shape? Usually in the family environment, in the context where we spend most of our time, which is almost always our safety and comfort zone.
Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our Light, not our Darkness that most frightens us. ~Marianne Williamson
When we are different, and our behavior is not expected, safety disappears, and sometimes we are afraid. For example, in a family where traditional work is valued, if a family member is engaged in art or a programmer, or a freelancer, he may have to listen: “This is not a real job.”
The disbelief of those we consider a source of support threatens our self-confidence and, in some cases, the way we value ourselves.
We feel secure in being true to family beliefs. We trail in the footsteps of our parents, we get a job like theirs … But when this does not happen, the feeling of protection is broken to give way to fear and the desire to be invisible at certain moments.
Here are the three fears that make us wish to become Invisible.
It is not just the family that can make us want to be invisible to be like others and not stand out. Many other fears grow and grow stronger because of certain beliefs that have to do with the social sphere. Let’s see what these three fears that do not allow us to expose who we really are are.
1. Fear of arousing the envy of others
We all have something unique, an inimitable ability or a natural gift that allows us to do things we would like to be recognized. However, we know that standing out involves exposing yourself and making others feel uncomfortable and even envious. So, as consequence, we may have to face criticism, judgment, and rejection.
For some, depending on your past experiences, this can be unbearable because we always expect others to approve of us. The desire to shine, to be accepted but also the fear of doing so, gives rise to two options: to shine and show our essence, or to be invisible and to follow the outlooks of others.
2. The fear of being alone
Fear of being alone affects many people. We have the belief that we should be the way others approve to be accepted. For example: if we are too playful, but the friends around us are ashamed of us, we will try to change and suppress our natural tendencies, so we will not be alone.
Finally, we choose to be invisible, so others accept us more easily. However, what we must ask ourselves if is it worth to be with people who do not embrace us as we are? Being alone is like leaving our comfort zone. Why are we so afraid of not finding more friends, partners, or people who accept us? Have you asked yourself this question?
If we change our essence, there will come a time when we will ask ourselves who we really are. Choosing to be what others want means betraying ourselves, a rejection of who we are that will eventually cause us great discomfort.
Recovering who we will be a process that will lead us to face everything we fear. It is a complicated path, but it is gratifying when we reach the goal because there is nothing more pleasant than a reunion with ourselves.
3. Fear of losing our public identity
If in our childhood our family told us that “we do not deserve what we receive,” it is very likely that we will grow thinking and act accordingly. Thus, we will not only think that we do not deserve a gift, but also that we are not worthy of attention nor of affection. We have adopted an identity based on unworthiness.
Curiously, we dread losing what they told us we were. This identity with which we do not identify, though we have learned to adapt. That’s why it’s so hard to change. We build a world according to what we think we are, with what they say we are. Therefore, without realizing it and unintentionally, we avoid any sign of affection.
Therefore, it is imperative to unlearn this behavior to know who we are indeed. We often choose invisibility because we believe that the opinion of others about who we are is always right.
We may have chosen invisibility so far, but we can decide to stop. We can get rid of the labels that were imposed on us and the fears that only serve to limit us and find in us the best of all companies.
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About the Author
Cathedral of the Soul intends to undertake the challenge of creating a multidimensional healing space that is dedicated to those who seek to enrich, enlighten and heal themselves while serving and assisting in the healing of others. Cathedral of the Soul is one of the many spiritual outreaches of Humanity Healing International, a registered 501C3 nonprofit with Church status. https://cathedralofthesoul.org
