Tao Precepts to Deal with Challenging Relationships
The teachings of the Tao contain beautiful embers of knowledge that continue to inflame our ability to learn, enlightening us with your temperance to deal with greater wisdom with the complexities of the world today.
The Tao and Relationships
The TAO is the origin of that which permeates and sustains all Creation. In TAO, everything has a natural way of being. There is only happiness when one respects the natural flow of Creation. The modifications and interferences all that is Life is what triggers pain and suffering in existence.
The Tao is known as the perfect path, as a natural order underlying the substance and activity of the Universe. The Tao is the path, the Journey and the traveler at the same time.
The main work of Taoism is Tao Te Ching, a book containing the teachings attributed to Lao Tse, together with the writings of Zhuangzi, form the philosophical foundation of this Eastern religion.
Over time, several Taoist schools have emerged that have blended teachings and practices before Tao Te Ching – such as the theories of the School of Naturalists, which address the concepts of the Yin-Yang and the five elements of Nature.
Taoist traditions and fundamentals emphasize, as a basis for a life with balance and wisdom, the following behaviors:
- The Serenity Living
- Non-action
- the empty
- the Control of desires
- Simplicity and spontaneity
- the contemplation of nature
Along with the cultivation of the Three Treasures: compassion, moderation, and humility.
Within the teachings of the Tao, we also find wise counsel in how to deal with difficult people. Especially of those whose presences rob us of energy and often obstruct our ways.
According to the Lao-Tse principles, in these cases, it is best to keep the serenity, to empty ourselves of negative emotions, and to remove the power of those who are likely to snatch our calm.
To the unstable world we live in, it is necessary to learn how to manage problematic people and to deal with difficult personalities.<
We have proof that to survive in our professional and social contexts, we must coexist vigorously with precise personality profiles. We refer to passive-aggressive people and also narcissistic people. They are presences that swarm in almost all scenarios, that make use of the verbal abuse, of the manipulation and that, sometimes, its mere presence already obscures to us.
The Four Taoist Precepts
Tao teaches many tools; At first, they are for the good management of emotions, secondly, for the proper control of states with which we can ultimately confront the abuse of power, establish limits, and improve our communication styles.
It does not matter that the texts of Lao-Tse are so many centuries old. This legacy remains very useful.
- Control difficult people without having to fight them
“Controlling the enemy without fighting him is the greatest skill.”
-Gichin Funakoshi-
Within the teachings of Taoism, the allegory is exalted that living is like flowing through a river. Letting ourselves be guided by your channel without resistance is part of this harmony that we should all enjoy.
However, concepts such as struggle, confrontation or resistance are the antithesis of this idea of natural flow. On the effect in which we are merely encouraged to move forward with courage and flexibility. So those who choose, for example, to make use of the discussion, the constant affront with difficult people, will only have more discouragement and tremendous frustration.
Opting for “no fight” does not mean giving up or letting oneself burden. It means, above all, not to give power to those who do not deserve it, choosing the wisdom about violence and opting for calm before opening the floodgates, wide open, so that anxiety floods us.
- Empty your bowl of negative emotions
“Emptiness is the best starting point. So, let go of all your prejudices and be neutral. Do you know why this glass is so useful? Because it’s empty. ”
-Bruce Lee
Difficult people often ruin our day with a single word or comment. No matter how irrational their message may be, the inadequacy of their actions affects us. One of the tips that convey the teachings of Tao is that the less reactive we are, the more space we will have to make use of judgment.
Let us, therefore, try to control the anguish, the negative emotions. Once the difficult person has performed his maneuver, we will count to 10, and we will breathe deeply. Nobody has the right to ruin our day, so let’s empty ourselves of anger, spite and bad mood, one by one.
The mind should remain as a clean room, where the contaminated wind enters through a portal and disappears in the second through the other.
- Be Proactive, Not Reactive
Difficult people sometimes make us victims of their unhealthy arts. Little by little, we may suffer from frustration that we run the risk of reacting in the worst possible way. Sooner or later, we will regret the reaction, especially if we haven’t set boundaries beforehand.
“Do not be a slave to anything or anyone, achieve true freedom.”
-Right, Jeet Kune Do-
See Also
The Tao recommends that we learn to be proactive. What exactly does that mean? It means that we must learn to take control of events instead of observing things happen.
One counsel that Tao teaches us is that every time we see a problematic person, let’s try to put ourselves in their place using the phrase “it should not be easy.”
When adopting this understanding statement “It should not be easy for my coworker to get everyone sick, to have so little control of their emotions.” “It should not be easy for my brother to be out of work, in debt and also have that complicated character.”
Understanding the perspective of other people will allow us to be prepared to control the situation better. This will make it more efficient when we are ready to give help than when we make constructive criticism. That is more accurate and motivating.
- Using The strength of Bamboo
“There are times when everything else fails, there is no choice but to be blunt. Like bamboo that gains strength after being folded. ”
The Tao of Leadership
Sometimes it happens, our circumstances with difficult people reach a limit, and we are just cornered, but we feel defeated, even wholly humiliated. At such times, the Tao advises us to visualize ourselves as bamboo.
They also bend over, they also get the impact of the strong wind that wants to control them and have them under their power. Nevertheless, the bamboo draws its strength from its flexibility. The fact that bamboo leans makes the reaction stronger.
We can do it, too. We should not use any type of violence, because strength does not reside in Violence, but on the capacity for response. it is important to know how to position ourselves with courage before those who dare to challenge us to become something that we are not: weak people.
To conclude, the teachings of the Tao contain beautiful embers of knowledge that continue to inflame our ability to learn, enlightening us with your temperance to deal with greater wisdom with the complexities of the world today.
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