Overcoming Fears and Phobias
by Ann Christine Johnson
Fear is a normal, natural reaction to imaginary and real threats; a built-in survival mechanism but when our life is ruled by fear that’s called addiction. Each of us has a biological fear of famine, cold and dearth, and not having sufficient money to buy off and hold off those realities; an in-built fear of falling and a fear of noise. These specific fears are a kind of alarm system given to us by nature as a means of self-preservation. Normal fear in certain situations is helpful – if you see and hear a car heading towards you and step aside you survive. The brief fear of being run over is overcome by your action. All other fears are given to us by our parents, caregivers, teachers and other authority figures, and all others who influenced our early years.
A phobia is a persistent, abnormal and irrational fear of a specific thing or situation (e.g. flying insects; closed-in spaces; heights; job interviews; public speaking; dates; public places; needles; driving on highways and up steep hills; going to the dentist; snakes) that compels one to avoid it, despite the awareness and reassurance that it isn’t dangerous. Abnormal fear is harmful and destructive. Constantly indulging in fear-based thoughts will result in irrational fears, obsessions or complexes. To fear something ceaselessly causes in us a sense of panic, nausea and terror. Abnormal fear takes place when we allow our imagination to run riot (wander undisciplined). By persisting in this type of behaviour in time we will undoubtedly attract what we fear the most. The answer to abnormal fear is to move towards the opposite of what you fear. When fear arises there immediately comes with it a desire for something that is opposite to the feared thing. Get completely engrossed in your desire. This will give you confidence, lift your spirits and allow you to return to a place of peace.
Fear can enter our lives when we least expect it. When it gathers momentum, it can destroy our physical and emotional health. Its intensity can overwhelm us, keep us stuck in a cycle of passivity and negativity, hold us back from being what we could be, or doing what we could be doing in order to move forward with our lives. Akin to all other emotions, fear exists for very good reasons, and in some circumstances is the normal, natural reaction to what is occurring, hence we need to give it space to be heard so we can understand what it is trying to tell us.
Next time you feel afraid ask yourself whether the fear you are experiencing is based in reality or whether it’s a product of your imagination. If it’s based in reality, you need to leave immediately if you are in harm’s way; to not take foolish, uncalculated risks; to not put yourself in needless physical danger; to breathe deeply and compose yourself; to stand your ground or speak up for yourself if required (but only if it’s physically safe to do so); to not allow the fear to overwhelm and paralyse you; to not suppress and ignore the fear, but instead to intensely experience it, sit with it for awhile, and then gently to let it go. Only then will you be able to deal with the situation in a calm manner.
Feelings are an indicator of your current thoughts. The way to overcome mild and irrational fears, with no serious substance, is to choose ‘better feeling’ thoughts; to do the thing you are afraid to do whilst believing you can master that fear – and in time you will; to supplant fear-based thoughts with positive ones; to systematically de-sensitise yourself to what you fear – small increments work best; to mentally face your fears before you physically do; to hold your fears up to the light of reason; and laugh at your fears as laughter is the best medicine. Most fears are acquired so it’s up to you to get rid of them! A word of caution: If your fears and phobias persist you should see your doctor. He/she can then refer you to see a clinical psychologist.
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About the Author
Ann C. Johnson Assoc MAPS: General Psychologist has worked in the helping professions for the past 35 years. In the past 7 years she has published 3 books on personal and spiritual development. Inspired by post Ann reads on Facebook and events happening in her own life she continues to write articles on a regular basis. Ann can also be found on: https://www.facebook.com/annjohnson1948
