Evaluate Your Feelings
Evaluate Your Feelings: Discover What Happens in You
by Leonard Jacobson
Feelings and Healthy Response
Feelings are just energies arising within you. They have a message to deliver. They indicate an appropriate response to whatever is occurring in the present moment. They are indicators of what you need or what you want in this very moment.
The simplest example of this is the feeling of thirst. What is the appropriate response to that feeling? Drink! It is so simple. Feeling hungry? Eat. Feeling lonely? Call a friend and meet for lunch. The feelings will arise, and as you respond appropriately, the feeling will subside or dissolve.
But there are more complex feelings. If you feel angry, what is that feeling of anger telling you? Anger has a message – you are either not getting what you want, or you are getting what you don’t want.
What is the appropriate response? Ask for what you want or state clearly what you don’t want. When you respond in this way, anger will dissolve immediately. It will only last a few seconds. After a while, you will recognize that there is no need for anger. Just ask for what you want.
It is the same with the feelings of hurt or sadness. These feelings have the same message as anger – you are not getting what you want, or you are getting what you don’t want. So respond! Express what you want. State what you don’t want.
But most of us have learned to repress our feelings. This begins in early childhood and continues throughout our lives. We finish up with reservoirs of difficult feelings repressed within us, like anger, hurt, sadness, pain, unfulfilled need and fear. Then when a feeling arises in the moment, which invites an appropriate and immediate response, these feelings from the past come flooding in. We are overwhelmed.
The past is projecting onto the present, preventing us from responding to what is actually occurring in this moment. Instead we react, based on what happened to us in the past. This creates so much disharmony and conflict in our lives and relationships.
Emptying Regressed Feelings
We have regressed to childhood without realizing it. If we are to become truly responsive in the moment, we will have to go through a process of liberating those feelings repressed with us. We will have to empty out those reservoirs of repressed feelings by allowing them to surface into conscious and responsible expression.
You are not trying to get rid of these feelings. You are simply allowing them to express. Everything in existence has a right to exist, including the feelings of need, hurt and anger. If they were denied the right to exist when you were young, because they were too painful then or simply not allowed expression, they will have to be restored into the flow of conscious expression that was once denied them.
Feelings will surface with a story from the past. It is important that you do not believe in the story, and yet you must allow the story to emerge. It is as though you are playing two parts. On the one hand, you are needy, sad, hurt, or angry and you express it fully and authentically. On the other hand, you are fully present as the feelings arise.
You are witnessing the whole event as it emerges from within you, and you know that it does not have anything to do with the present moment. You know that it is simply the past emerging for completion. You are not trying to fix anything or get rid of anything. You are simply correcting the earlier decision that you made as a child to repress difficult feelings. You denied those feelings the right to exist. And now you are restoring those feelings to their right to exist and express.
Responsibility for Feeling
But as an awakening adult, you do so responsibly. Do not dump the feelings on anyone. These feelings need you to be present with them as they surface and express, and they need to arise and express within an environment of love and acceptance. They need to be allowed to be themselves as they express.
Anger needs to be allowed full expression in response to feeling hurt. Allow it, but do not identify with it. Do not believe in the story. Exaggerate it until you begin laughing. Anger repressed, leads to violence and abuse of others. Anger expressed responsibly, leads to laughter, forgiveness and compassion. If sadness arises, then cry. It will soon pass and be replaced by joy.
Do not be afraid of your feelings. They cannot hurt you, and if you accept full responsibility for your feelings, they will never lead you to hurt or abuse others. And your body will be extremely grateful to you for relieving it of the burden of having to store these repressed and painful emotions for you.
Click HERE to Connect with your Daily Horoscope!
About the Author
Leonard Jacobson is an awakened spiritual teacher, mystic and gifted healer, who is deeply committed to helping others break through to the joyous experience of living in the NOW. For more than 30 years, Leonard has been teaching people how to become fundamentally present and how to arise in mastery of the mind and ego, making awakening available to everyone. He is the author of five books and travels throughout the U.S., Europe, Australia and Asia offering inspiration, healing and guidance to those on the path of spiritual awakening. For more information visit www.leonardjacobson.com.
