You Chose Your Parents
By Cori Savenelli
At the moment we decide to be born into this life, we choose – yes, choose – who our parents will be. This is a concept that resonates with some, and seems totally ridiculous to others, but it benefits us to consider it as a possibility for a number of reasons.
Whatever problems we feel have happened through the intervention of our parents, the reality is that there’s not a soul among us who can say that our strength and character did not come, at least in some part, from our experiences with them. We need them to guide us though this maze of human existence, to learn and grow through the lessons we’ve chosen to study while in this life. We all have some unpleasant memories of our parents. It is because we are all human. Yes, even them! When we resent them or blame them for our lives, what we are doing is deciding that we are too weak to develop our own characters, doing the best we can by utilizing the information we’ve been given – the information we chose to use. This attitude taints the spirit, and attracts negative energy into every aspect of your life. You were born to your particular parents for a reason; you have inherited a collection of genes from them, but that’s it. Biologically, you have inherited their genes, but your spirit is completely yours. You are not them. To believe this is to suggest that you are not a person of completeness or free will. This is not the intention of the Universe.
For those of us who had a wonderful relationship with our parents, the blessings are obvious, and the reality is that we decided that family turmoil was not a lesson we needed to learn from in this life. Therefore our parents were chosen to guide us through other adventures toward our spiritual growth.
As time goes by, we see them differently. We see them as human, we see them change, and we see them grow as a result of our presence in their lives. They have just as much to learn from us as we do from them, only it is not as obvious to us the role we play in their lives until we, ourselves, become older and wiser. We see how we’ve opened their eyes to certain things, how we’ve helped them discover further who they are as a result of having cared for us. Those of us who are parents ourselves get to watch them interact with our children. They become wiser, and the anxieties surrounding raising children become muted once they realize what a bang-up job they did with us. The Universe is always at work in our growth and wellbeing. Each generation gets a chance to benefit from the wisdom of that understanding. It really is a beautiful process!
When we think of happy memories of our parents, the most beautiful ones usually involve some type of interaction, and usually happened when we are very young. Playing in the yard; piling in the car on a Friday night and going out for ice cream; you and your siblings getting viciously tickled by your dad; standing on a chair to watch your mom cook, or just being read the same bedtime story for the nine millionth time. More unfavorable memories usually surface later, when adolescence takes over our brains.
Our parents deserve all of our gratitude. They have shaped us in ways we will never truly understand. They have sacrificed, and given us all they could within their power, using the resources and knowledge that they had. They forgot who they were a long time ago in order to help you become the person you are, and to fulfill your potential.
Be grateful for the time you had with your parents, and if you are lucky enough to still have them, be grateful for the time you still have … and try to give them a break. They may not have done everything right, but raising kids is no walk in the park, and they’ve done their best with what knowledge they had.
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