Does Your Boss Really Give a Damn?
Lately I’ve been hearing about some terrible workplace situations. People are being bullied, sexually harassed, and abused by colleagues or supervisors. What makes each of these situations even worse is a pervasive attitude on the part of managers: that of apathy and denial toward destructive interpersonal dynamics in the workplace.
For every enlightened administration that not only cares about a healthy workplace environment but actually puts in place the necessary structures to create this, there are numerous administrations that don’t care, don’t want to know, or refuse to believe that toxic interpersonal dynamics are adversely affecting the day-to-day morale and productivity of their workers.
It’s a poorly-kept secret that you don’t go to your boss with a problem regarding a colleague or supervisor. Everyone knows that the majority of bosses will feel like you’ve brought them a problem that they don’t want to deal with. They see you as causing them more stress, if you come to them “complaining” about another person in your workplace.
It’s also common knowledge that if you go to HR about the problem with your colleague, HR will tell you to involve your boss, which brings you right back to the same problematic place.
It’s sad but true that no matter how terrible your interpersonal problem is, going to your boss with it is more often than not, a bad idea. You’ll be seen as someone who “can’t get along with others” or who creates more work for your already over-loaded boss. In the end, you’re left to figure out how to deal with the situation on your own.
Most bosses these days have little will to get in there and sort out interpersonal problems with their staff. They don’t have the time or the skills to mediate these types of issues.The net result of your involving your boss in your workplace difficulties will be that they’ll end up resenting you, the problem will remain unresolved, and the person you complained about will be that much more hostile toward you.
If you’re one of the lucky few, your boss is an exception to this rule and is part of an administration that understands how beneficial it is for the organization to support its workers by helping to resolve their interpersonal difficulties. If you’re lucky, your boss recognizes that there should be a zero-tolerance policy toward bullying, or any type of harassment, for that matter.
If you’re one of the rare few whose boss really does give a damn, you’ll be able to go to them when a colleague or supervisor is mistreating you and instead of turning a blind eye, feeling overwhelmed or resenting you for burdening them, your boss will help you to sort things out.
This type of boss is an asset to any organization, as they boost morale and productivity, decrease both absenteeism and presenteeism and bring out the best in all of their staff.
Wouldn’t it be great if there were more bosses in the workplace who really did give a damn?
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About the Author
Marcia Sirota MD FRCP(C) is a board-certified psychiatrist, that does not ascribe to any one theoretical school. Rather, she has integrated her education and life experiences into a unique approach to the practice of psychotherapy. She considers herself a realist with a healthy measure of optimism. Sign up here for her free monthly wellness newsletter. Listen here to her latest podcast. marciasirotamd.com
