What are the Attributes of Conscious Relationships?
A conscious relationship should be something that adds to your life – both individually and together. There are five essential characteristics of consciously inspired relationships.
Conscious Relationships
What would really be a conscious relationship?
To understand how you can create more conscious relationships, let’s look at what consciousness really is.
“Consciousness” is something that feeds us to find what will complete, heal, and resolve things in our lives. In reality, awareness is about recognizing that you are not incomplete or limited, nor is it a problem to be solved. Consciousness as mindfulness is the ability to acknowledge that you have infinite choices and capabilities and always be open to greater possibilities.
Consciousness is very pragmatic.
A conscious relationship should be something that adds to your life – both individually and together. It is about contributing to each other, having a sense of freedom and empowerment, so that their lives are longer due to their choice to be a couple.
Making a relationship work is a difficult task today. Good old recipes no longer work, and a single secret, one size fits all for everyone, is an impossible mission. That’s because the relationship paradigms are changing. The ideas of Love and happiness are changing at a swift pace.
This may sound bad, but it is not. When the old recipes fail, we need to seek the bases to live a more fruitful and conscious life in ourselves.
When old structures come into crisis, we need to transform and get to know ourselves. Observing healthy couples in their partnerships, we learned five essential characteristics of consciously inspired relationships.
1. Accept the fact that no one is perfect. In a conscient relationship, mutual growth and happiness are the goals.
In a conscious relationship, being perfect is not part of the script. It’s not about being okay and agreeing with everything about our partner, either. It’s about knowing what works for you and being willing to see how you can co-create the relationship, rather than just letting resentment build.
This does not mean that what happens in the relationship does not matter. We do not entertain fantasies and ideals that can be very harmful and oppressive to our partners and us. In other words, we are more committed to our conscious evolution than making things work at any cost.
The idea of what is right can be quite a prison one because many experiences that we need to go through are not exactly happy and beautiful. Still, they are the ones that deepen our reflections and partnerships. Whenever you encounter a difficulty with your partner, know that you have taken another step towards a deeper connection and a more conscious relationship.
2. Everyone that is in a relationship is also dealing with their own ghosts.
We all have ghosts and trauma from our past. When we live alone, we can escape individual experiences that trigger specific fears. Being in a relationship prevents our escape. Sooner or later, we will experience something that will make us confront our worst shadow sides. The conscious couple knows that these moments were not generated by the other but by attachment to false beliefs and fears.
Most relationships are built with the idea that the partner will solve a problem or fill in some missing element. This is one of our most unconscious ways of functioning in relationships. It is also “brilliant” because it means that we never have to commit to our relationships either.
Suppose you are really willing to create a successful and conscious relationship with your partner. You will need to look at the possibilities you have in your relationship. Do not prioritize the needs for answers or solutions you think your relationship should provide.
The other is no longer the cause of pain and becomes a companion in observing our history. By taking responsibility for ourselves (instead of blaming others for our fears), we can dissolve old patterns with Love and freedom. That is one of the most gratifying aspects of a conscious loving relationship, mutual liberation.
3. All feelings are welcome. No internal process is shameful.
This is a challenging but necessary trait of a conscious relationship. Still, it must be patiently cultivated—the ability to be honest with ourselves and with each other.
There is no delicate terrain in the conscious relationship, themes that we cannot talk about, that would need to be repressed or silenced within us.
Even if we do not admit it, we live in a culture that behaves as if Love is something we do to please the partner. If pleasing the other comes with a price tag such as self-repression, we will have significant problems because Love does not grow on infertile soil.
We need to learn to communicate, to talk about ourselves. Never point fingers, but extend your hands, asking for help and understanding.
4. The Conscious Relationship is the Place to practice Love
Love is, ultimately, a practice—a practice of acceptance, of being present, of forgiving and extending our hearts to vulnerable territories.
Love is a path and not a destination. We often treat Love as a place of arrival, a lovely moment that makes us feel like we are failing when it is not happening.
However, Love is the journey and not the final destination. A conscious relationship observes every step of the way and asks how Love can enter that movement. It is committed to the entry and practice of Love in the most unexpected places.
Have you considered the possibility of ending relationships without trauma and drama, with ease, peace, and kindness in a process that most people believe has to be a painful struggle?
The expansion of consciousness creates a different possibility, not only to leave relationships but also to be in them.
5. Don’t use your relationship as a platform for Judgments.
Consciousness includes everything and judges nothing.
That should also include you, your partner, and your relationships. When you cut judgment, you have a space of gratitude to grow. And when you have an appreciation, everything can expand in life. A conscious relationship allows for the continuous growth of possibilities and gratitude.
In a conscious relationship, the scope of infinite possibilities is an essential element. Most of us have been walking the same path for so long since we started our relationship, so we use ourselves in a routine. There are walls on the left and right, and we cannot see any other options.
When you ask questions such as “what else is possible here that we have not considered?” It opens up possibilities you’ve never seen before. What will happen is that you will have an awareness of something you can do differently, allowing for a change in the areas you feel trapped. The possibilities and the potential for co-creating in a deeply connected relationship is the “jewel inside the Lotus.” But the way they present themselves specifically will be different for each couple and individual.
Awareness is about being willing to do what works and what enriches your relationship.
You will also enjoy The Secret Keys to Spiritual Attraction Between Two Souls
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